Sunday, August 22, 2010

No Easy Way Out

It's been a long week, but I'm happy to say Chris and John have FINALLY returned from medical school!! They've been gone for about 4 months but some how it seems longer than that. It's just good to have them around again.

The downfall to that though is all the big dinners and going out we do for the 2 weeks while they're home. Don't get me wrong, it's really fun, but my waist line certainly doesn't appreciate it. Not to mention my dad, my sister and my grandma's birthdays are all this week coming up so that means more dinners out than normal... oh and my mom's birthday is the week after. I know that I have to really try to watch myself over the next 2 weeks but I also know that I have to enjoy it a little bit too.

Over the past couple of weeks I haven't been feeling very happy with myself and how I look. Maybe it's just a complex I have, but I'm incredibly frustrated. I made a really good coffee chip ice cream and the other night I was looking at the container of it on the counter. I was staring down into it thinking about how I could polish off that entire container without even thinking about it, but I opted to just have a spoonful. I definitely think about the food I could be eating or that I'd like to eat, but then I snap back to reality and remember that since I'm a former fat girl it just can't happen.

I have to take the time to mention that my 14-year-old sister commented on my last blog entry and gave me some suggestions that might help me drop the bit of weight that I'm complaining about. She just recently dropped about 15 pounds in the past 3 months and I'm really proud of her because I know how hard it can be especially for us girls that like to eat! While I appreciate the suggestions I have to say that there is a big difference in a 14-year-old's body and a 25-year-old's body. How many of you ladies out there around this age see those teeny boppers with perfect bodies that make you want to puke? Not to mention, our lives are completely different.

When I was her age, I was home all day during the summer so there was more time to exercise, etc. Now it's completely different... I leave the house early, work a full day and sometimes depending on the day, don't get home again until almost 8 pm. It definitely becomes more challenging as you get older because you don't have the free time that you used to and you're definitely more tired at the end of the day. Another difference is that I drink and she doesn't. I am not a heavy drinker by any means, but I have wine almost every night--at least one glass. Some nights I'll have a cocktail followed by wine at dinner, or if I happen to go out and have a drink with one of my friends that also makes a difference. Over the past 2 weeks, I have cut back on my cocktail intake... I try to only have one if I am out to dinner and just opt for wine. Those are added calories that a 14-year-old doesn't worry about. Still, I love the fact that my sister took the time to read my blog and offer suggestions... they are definitely very appreciated :)

I also have the pleasure of having a naturally slow metabolism... if I don't stimulate my metabolism it will completely shut down which is why I eat several small meals a day. Friday morning for example, I made scrambled eggs, had a yogurt for snack, had salad for lunch, followed up by some watermelon before I left the office. Dinner was... well, minus the appetizers we had for the table... pretty decent. I had some turkey chili which was awesome as always followed by some roasted chicken with a balsamic glaze, which was very well done. I ate no potatoes, had no bread and no dessert. If I ate every time I was hungry I'd be as big as a house, but I also don't like eating a lot at one time, which is why I'm also a fan of eating smaller meals. I would love to be more active, but there just isn't as much time for it as I'd like. That's a sad reality of getting older... you really have less and less time for the things you want to do.

This weekend took an unfortunate turn. Early Saturday morning our  10 1/2 year old golden retriever Remi died. We sat with her as she took her last breath and she went peacefully. As hard as it is, I'm grateful that we were with her. I made myself go to the gym and do some other errands before Chris & John's return bash. Party was great and definitely needed after the morning I'd had. Today was my sister and my dad's birthday celebration. I don't even want to think about all the things that I ate, but everyone has to have a cheat day. Granted, over the next 2 weeks I'll have more "cheat days" than I normally do, but Chris and John are only home for a short time so I make the most of it. I'll also be back in the gym tomorrow probably doing some serious cardio and abs.

Until next time...


  1. While I realize the futility of attempting to pull you out of your sea of self-sorrow and delusion and back into the reality in which everyone else resides, the main reason for this post is to defend the honor of the 14-year old sister you spent half the post besmirching.

    Your 14-year old sister was giving you some excellent tips from her own (SUCCESSFUL!) experience. All of them were good, made sense and most importantly, could be applied directly to you! Instead of being a jerk to her via interest and attempting to discredit her because she's 14. Think about this:Did you ever loss 15 pounds in any of those summers that you didn't do a thing and had all this free time?

    Also, what are these differences between a 14-year old and a 25-year old?

    Can a 25-year old body not take the stairs?
    Can a 25-year old body not take your dogs on long walks?
    Can a 25-year old body not substitute lard for jelly??
    Can a 25-year old body not swim in a pool?
    Can a 25-year old not eat less?
    Can a 25-year old, non-alcoholic not cut out some booze from her diet?

    I can't imagine how frustated you're family, who sees you everyday, must be with you, because I'm incredibly frustrated just by reading the blog posts. Each post contains enough calories to feed an army and enough whine to get that army drunk afterward.

  2. Marisa - enjoying the blog and have been reading for a while! The new gym with your cousin sounds like a good idea. I know that not being able to lose weight when you feel like you are really trying is one of the most frustrating things ever - for that reason I want to share a few ideas. Also, don't worry about the negative comments it comes with putting yourself out there on a blog. Sometimes those from the outside can see things you may have overlooked.

    -Doing 20 minutes of cardio isn't really enough to result in substantial weight loss. Have you tried spinning? I find it's a great way to get in 45-60 minutes of cardio without even noticing.
    -Consider signing up for a race. There really is no substitute for just getting out and running. Training and the experience on race day are fun and can be a goal that isn't a number on the scale.
    -Try counting your calories for a few days. You may find that you are consuming more than you realize, even though you are eating healthy things. When I was in college I gained about 15 pounds and lost it literally eating a granola bar for breakfast, cottage cheese for lunch and chicken for dinner. While I agree that starving is not good for your metabolism, it really is science. 3500 calories = one pound. You can find websites or a nutritionist to help you know how many calories you should net per day.

    Keep up the work and don't be discouraged - just try new things!

  3. Let me start off by saying good to hear from you! Thank you for taking the time to read my blog, it means a lot! I appreciate your suggestions. The calorie counting is definitely something I'm gonna start to do. I definitely think that I might be taking in more on certain days than I realize. The new gym I joined has some great classes like Zumba and cardio kick boxing which I would prefer to take for cardio rather than spin or running. I struggle with cardio as it is so spin and running are a bit out of my range. I really appreciate the positive feedback and the helpful hints!

    As for the negative comments... it's clear that Horacio, you have no idea what the purpose of this blog is. I am not writing this to whine to the public... I am being HONEST. People who struggle with their weight understand the constant battle, the need to have to eat a lot of things you don't want to or spend time eating healthy, working out and not get the results you want. This isn't something that's a quick fix... this is a lifestyle and sometimes you're gonna hit speed bumps. I know that putting this out for the blog community and the general public leaves me open to getting fired at, but that certainly doesn't derail me. Horacio,if my blog is such an annoyance to you, please do me and everyone else a favor and STOP reading it. It's obvious all you're interested in is twisting my words and if I'm that frustrating for you, you definitely shouldn't be interested in anything I have to say. For the record, let me just say that I wasn't shooting down my sister's suggestions...I flat out said that I appreciated what she had to say. I was simply pointing out that our bodies and our lifestyles are different. A 14 yr old and a 25 yr old's bodies do not metabolize food the same way, we don't burn calories the same way. My sister spends 8 hours a day in school, takes gym, plays tennis and is home with enough time that if she wanted to work out before dinner she has time for that most nights because her lifestyle is DIFFERENT than mine. And by the way, when I was 14 I was 5'7 and 120lb pounds so I had no trouble keeping it off then. Life changes and the best I can do is adapt to those changes in the best way possible. I'm looking forward to trying new things. Thanks again Sheri :)