Thursday, June 9, 2011


Just wanted to let everyone know that I'm moving my blog over to a new site so I hope that those of you who have followed me here will follow me over there! I promise to have posts up soon :)

Monday, May 30, 2011

What does it take?!

How did my 3 day weekend disappear so fast? I'm not really sure how that happened. These recent weeks have all felt like one blur after the other. This week was my favorite... weigh-in week so let's get to the results before anything else. Last month's number are in parenthesis.

Weight: 152 (152)
Waist: 30 (30)
Hips: 38 3/4 (38 3/4)
R Thigh: 20 3/4 (21)
R bicep: 10 1/2 (10 1/4)
Shoulders: 38 3/4 (39)
Body Fat: 26.2% (26.4%)

Obviously there hasn't been much of a change so I was pretty upset on Tuesday. I am convinced that once I hit that 152 bench mark my body says, "STOP! Sorry, you're not allowed to weigh any less!" It's just unfair. Joe tried to be positive and remind me that I lost a pound of fat & about an inch, but somehow that still didn't make me feel better. What kills me is I'm so particular about my food! I prepare most of my own stuff & I limit my carbs, I don't eat fatty foods & my weight still refuses to move down! Maybe the fact that I eat pretty much the same food week in and week out has something to do with it? Maybe my lack of sleep during the week is effecting my body? Maybe I could do more cardio? I really don't know, and unfortunately Joe didn't have many more answers for me.  So he proceeded to kill me with a primarily upper body/core work out... 4 days later my arms were still sore!

I felt so defeated Tuesday night I just wanted to cry. When you struggle with something and then work really hard and nothing changes it's hard.  I understand that I have less weight to lose now so I'm not going to drop a lot each month, but I am not content at 152.  

I realize this is an issue I've gotta work out with myself. How thin is thin enough? I look at myself & think 8 more pounds & I'd feel more comfortable, but I just don't know how realistic that is given how much trouble I'm having right now. I can recall feeling this way when my weight woes began to pile on when I was about 15. I noticed I'd put on a few pounds & tried to get my eating under control so I would get on track, but somehow that never happened. My friend Ryan & I were talking just the other day about the lunches we used to eat in high school. I won't disclose his former lunches (HAHA) because this is about my past faults & current path but I can remember eating pepperoni & cheese sandwiches & on some days getting a side of fries or a cookie or some ice cream. Then there were days that I ate a turkey sandwich & I'd have some frozen yogurt & I thought I'd had a good day. Just goes to show that when you're uneducated about what food you're putting into your body what you think is "healthy" is just not. I wouldn't touch half of the stuff I used to eat with a 10 foot pole! I won't even go into what my work outs were like back then because compared to what I do now, I don't think you could even really call them work outs. I guess that's the thing about hindsight. Looking back it all seems so much clearer & you just have to hope not to repeat the mistakes.

The 3 day weekend was fantastic! It was so nice not having to go to work today & having a 4 day work week is pretty awesome too. Naturally I ate & drank a little more than normal, but I did hit the gym Saturday morning before the holiday weekend eating began so I wasn't a total waste. Tomorrow I will get back into my routine, which is always a good thing. I've gotta figure out how I'm going to attack this problem & hit it head on. My first thought is shake up the food. The body always responds better to shock than habit.

Before I go I figured I'd show a few comparison pictures to show where I'm at. I'm not gonna give up because I just don't have it in me to quit, so now it just means I've gotta work a little harder & I can do that. The other alternative is to go back to what I used to be & for me that's not even an option. Happy Memorial Day & thank you to all of our troops & veterans for their service!

March 2011...
May 2011...rocking leggings & a shirt I wouldn't have been able to wear 20 pounds ago. 
This past week...trying to focus on the positive & keep at it. 

Until next time... 

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Keep Moving Forward...

I feel like it's been forever since I've posted! The last 3 weeks have been hectic to say the least. My cousins were home from medical school, which is always a lot of fun, but it usually means lots of nights out and activities planned. Some of the fun things we did were go to a Yankee game followed by a trip to the best wings place on the Upper East Side (ate the HOTTEST wings of my entire life!!), went out for Cinco de Mayo, saw Thor, & had some awesome dinners. John headed back to the island last week & Chris headed to Texas for a 7 week course this morning. It's always sad when they go & I just hope the time goes by fast.

I also finished school for the semester last week & I can't even express how happy I am! My 2 take home finals zapped so much energy out of me that I'm still trying to recoop from them. It's just good knowing that I have 3 months of not having to drive to school & do homework. GLORIOUS.

My body feels like it has been put through the ringer. I haven't taken a week off from the gym since the last time Joe gave me permission to do so which was early February. I think soon it may be time for another one of those weeks. I'm afraid I'm hitting one of those God awful plateaus and my body needs some sort of a shock.

Of course Joe's idea of shocking the body is making me do 4 sets of an exercise with at least 20 reps instead of 15. I know that he knows what he's doing, but I was having a hard enough time with 15 reps and now I've gotta do 20 on most exercises. And then last week, after I could barely keep my eyes open due to several late nights of working on my finals, Joe decides to make me do the dreaded plyos work out. I literally wanted to cry. I'm sorry, I don't care what any of the fitness people out there say, I have NO reason to be doing that type of work out. I am not training for any sport or endurance type of event. I don't care how many jumping squats I can do in 1 minute. There is challenging & then there is unnecessary & to me, that is completely unnecessary. Joe's response, "Well, you don't have to do crazy cardio after." UGH. Let us hope that work out doesn't come about any time soon.

I'm pretty bored with my food, but luckily the warmer temperatures mean more grilling! Oatmeal & I are on a break right now & I'm trying to eat a half of a grapefruit or yogurt on the days that I don't eat eggs for breakfast. Lunch most days I try to avoid carbs when I can, but I do allow myself at least one sandwich to break it up a bit. Dinners are usually protein and veggies & every night before bed I have some green tea & usually some Greek yogurt. I'm not sure what it is about night time, but I LOVE late night eating. I don't need to eat pizza or anything greasy at night, but I love to eat cereal or popcorn or some ice cream or a few cookies... obviously I avoid those things, but the late night eating urge is very hard to ignore.

Lately, I've been thinking a lot about my younger self. I've been thinking about how being over weight made me feel like I needed to constantly cover myself up. I was content to just blend into the background because that's where I thought I belonged. I never felt like the "pretty girl" I was just the tom boy who blended in as one of the guys. I guess It's funny how things like that really stick with you. Even though I'm not the same body type I was back then or the same person I was, I feel like that stigma doesn't just vanish. The thing that I've realized over the last couple of weeks is that I've gotta find a way to make my peace with it. I am who I am now & of course my past has shaped me but it doesn't have to necessarily define me.

I can't believe tomorrow is already Monday! The weekends just go by too fast! I've got a full week ahead, but the fact that I have no homework to do & I can relax, read the books I want to read, work on my own book & catch up on stuff I've had to put off makes me very happy. I've got one more week to go before weigh in so I'm hoping for some better results this time around. Maybe all those damn salads will actually pay off! Had to throw these pictures in before I signed off...
Me at age 4... unfortunately that baby fat lingered for a lot longer than it should have... 

A few weeks ago at the Yankee game... embracing the "new" me :) 
Until next time... 


Friday, April 29, 2011

Am I Standing Still?

Happy Friday to everyone! I feel like this week flew by, which in many respects is a very good thing. It was the LAST week of classes for the semester & I couldn't be happier. Sure, I still have 2 take home finals to complete & a paper to finish before I'm officially done for the semester, but at least I don't have to sit through class anymore. I am most definitely looking forward to a 3 month hiatus from school. Not to mention, I'm looking forward to saving my gas tank a little from all the back and forth.

I actually took off from work today so that I could get my paper done that's due on Monday. What a joy it was to not wake up at 6:15. No, I wasn't one of the many people that woke up at 4am to watch the Royal Wedding... I did what most people of this generation do... I Tivoed the event. I woke up at 8:30 and got to see the happy couple on the balcony at the palace & saw their two (gasp) kisses. Kate looked absolutely beautiful & she seemed so calm! I don't know if my wedding was on display to the entire world if I would be that calm, but kudos to her. I think what I loved the most was just how happy & in love Kate & Will looked with each other. Ahhhh...

Okay, back on topic... this past Tuesday was weigh in so without further adieu I will give the results. Last month's numbers are in parenthesis.

Weight: 152 (152)
Hips: 38 3/4 (39)
Waist: 30 (30)
R Thigh: 21 (21)
R Bicep: 10 1/2 (10 3/4)
Shoulders: 39 (39)
Body Fat: 26.4% (27.4%)

As you can see, there isn't much of a change... I did lose 2 pounds of fat based on the BMI calculations that Joe does so I'm happy with that & I lost 1/2 inch. I was also glad to see my body fat go down after it seemed to just kind of hover in the same place for the last several months. Like I've said, it seems that when I hit near this weight my body just stops working, which is obviously a concern for me. Joe told me to keep in mind that you could take two people that both weigh 150 pounds and one of them is 50% body fat & the other is 25% body fat & the 25% body fat person doesn't look like they weigh THAT much. He said by looking at me there is no way that anyone would say that I weigh 152, so I guess that is a good thing.

But in all honesty, I don't wanna be stuck here. I would feel more comfortable at 145. I don't know how realistic that is considering the muscle that I've put on, but it's worth entertaining. Speaking of muscle, I couldn't help but think during our work out on Tuesday that Joe is trying to lean me out with muscle. Normally we do 3 sets of most exercises of 15 reps & then reduce to 12 or 10 reps depending on how I'm feeling, but on Tuesday we did 2 sets and at least 20 reps on all of them. I never wished for 15 reps more in my life! Maybe that's going to be part of our new regime? If it keeps me from settling at this plateau, I'll suck it up.

I am getting increasingly bored with my food. I eat pretty much the same thing all the time... not every day but within a week there are many of the same things. I think I am in need of some new recipes to shake things up. Luckily, BBQ season is upon us and I can start using my grill again, which I love. Still, one of my biggest struggles is being a late night eater. I'm not sure what it is, but I LOVE to eat late night. Around 10, I feel that little bit of hunger creeping up in my stomach & I usually end up peering into the fridge hoping to find something. I end up fighting with myself for several minutes because what I really want is a bowl of ice cream or a bowl of cereal or some cookies, but I realize those aren't the right choices so I usually settle for some Greek yogurt or peanut butter on a graham cracker with my cup of green tea. So boring. I'm thinking that my body is in need of some kind of shock in an effort to kick start my metabolism a little bit more. I'll have to see what I can come up with.

Unfortunately, much of the next few days are going to require me to spend time with this paper, but at least by Monday afternoon I'll never have to look at it again. Tomorrow is supposed to be another beautiful spring day, which is perfect because I'll be heading to Yankee Stadium for the first time of 2011 with my cousins :) Most definitely looking forward to that! Before I go, here's comparison picture that made me feel better about my progress...
June 2010...yes, I'm sitting down, but that roll still existed.

April 2011...holding out my size 10 skinny jeans which are now too big on me. I like the number 8 better anyway!

Until next time...


Friday, April 22, 2011

Fat Bottom Girls

First off, let me apologize for the delay in posts. Things have been busier than normal the past two weeks. My grandma fractured her hip & ended up having it replaced so after all the hospital drama, getting her into a rehab center, & then getting her out, it’s been lots of long days. Thankfully, she is recovering nicely & will be back to her jovial self in no time!

This Tuesday was supposed to be weigh-in week, but Joe had to cancel and we couldn’t get together another day this week, so I’m stuck waiting until this coming Tuesday. Normally that’s not a big deal, but I would’ve preferred to get weighed BEFORE Easter.  

I don’t feel much different from last month, and it’s not because I’m eating whatever I want or anything like that, but I fear that I am inching toward one of the things I HATE the most… a plateau. It’s as if when my body nears a certain weight, it just says, “Sorry, you’re not going any lower than that!” How incredibly unfair is that? 

My other concern is that I’ve been hungry more often than I was a month or so ago. I’ll eat breakfast, maybe have a banana or something like that before lunch & I’m fine. Then I eat lunch & it seems that for the rest of the day I just feel hungry & it’s really getting on my nerves. I eat protein at lunch so it’s not like I’m eating a bunch of carbs, which burn up quickly & then I’m hungry. I was talking with my friend Ryan about it & we concluded that my work outs, which have me putting on more muscle, are probably to blame for my added hunger. Yes, I realize that’s perfectly normal, but as a former fat girl the added hunger & possible weight gain don’t sit well with me.

Before you go & think that I’m a psycho for thinking this way, you have to understand that when you’ve battled your weight your entire life, being hungry more often & the number on the scale going up are two things you NEVER want. I know that any added weight would likely be due to the muscle, but I have a very hard time with the number going up. I’m well aware that this is my issue that I’ve gotta find a way to work through it, but I’m sure a lot of people can relate. That's why the title of this week's blog is the great Queen song that Glee is re-popularizing (Fat Bottom Girls). The song sort of glorifies "bigger girls" if you will, but really what girl wants to be known as a fat bottom girl? Not this chick... 

I’m sure a lot of people can also relate to having a family (especially my fellow Italians) that is obsessed with food… cooking it, eating it & talking about it most of the time. We’re always talking about things we want to make, the place where we ate something really good, or we were watching a show & they were making blah blah & it looked so good. How is anyone, especially someone with a naturally slow metabolism supposed to stay thin in that kind of atmosphere? I mean, I could start another whole blog on food alone! Food is great… I love my heritage, I love my family’s traditions, & I love cooking, but I’d be flat out lying if I said that sometimes loving food like this can be problematic.

On a positive note, all of my clothes are too big so I guess that's a sign that I'm doing something right. However, that leaves me loathing everything in my closet & taking forever to get ready because I can't find anything that I'm not swimming in. The other thing about losing weight & your clothes not fitting is that those clothes represent the "old you"... the stuff you had to wear to cover up what you didn't want everyone to focus on. Sure, there's a whole new world of clothes out there for the "new you", but it takes a while to build up a closet so for now I'm just hating my clothes. 

I've made it to the gym twice this week & am definitely going to try to get there tomorrow morning. I'm cooking Easter dinner so tomorrow is prep day. The BEST part of this week has been the return of Chris & John from the island! I LOVE having them home! I'm definitely looking forward to them being around for the next couple of weeks! I will be sure to report back with the results of weigh in! I hope that everyone has a great Easter! 


Friday, April 8, 2011


One of my favorite Hootie & the Blowfish songs (Time) reminded me just how fast the time goes by. Also how I never seem to have enough time to do anything...not enough time to read my books, get to the gym, SLEEP, work on my book, make new recipes & did I mention sleep? Somehow it's already April! I have about 3 weeks left in my semester & I can't wait to be done! Chris & John return from the islands in less than 2 weeks which I'm very excited for!

The past 2 weeks of working out have been a bit of a struggle. Joe hasn't put me through any crazy work outs since the plyos work out from hell, but the lifting work outs have just been painful. It's rare that I wake up and something or several things don't hurt or ache. At this current moment, I have an ice pack on my bad shoulder but the rest of me is pretty sore too. I feel like I should be covered in lidoderm patches from head to toe. Or I'm just in serious need of that massage package I got for my birthday...

So this week's work out was another modified man work out, which I like just fine for the most part. I did full dead lifts with a 40 pound barbell, bench press, squat & single arm row, wood chop, tricep presses on a bar, & then this ab exercise where I had to lay down & keep my feet straight out in front of me raised off of the floor while holding a 20 pound barbell and bring my legs to the right, down, to the left and down. AWFUL. All I kept thinking was please don't let my sweaty hands drop this bar on my face. Luckily Joe was right above me so he had it covered.

Part of me has to laugh because Joe doesn't know my spazzy side. Sometimes when he asks me to do a certain exercise that's somewhat complicated I have to really force myself to think about what I'm doing so I don't look like a bumbling fool. Tuesday my spazziness came out a little bit even though I tried to cover it up, I had to just say, "I'm a bit of a spazz". He got a kick out of that & told me the better my core gets, the less of a spazz I'll be. I don't know if that's completely true, but it's definitely a nice thought.

Food... I'm starting to get very bored. I try to shake things up and spread it out so I  don't have too many carbs on one day. Still, it's mostly the same stuff all the time... chicken and salad, oatmeal, eggs, yogurt. I think I need a few new recipes and that might help. 2 more no meat Fridays to go and I think I will make it without putting myself in a total carb coma. I've had a massive craving for soft chocolate ice cream on a cone & I have to give myself kudos for suppressing the urge, but I feel that sooner or later I'm gonna have to satisfy the urge otherwise I'll go crazy.

Tomorrow it's back to the gym before game 2 of the Yankees/Red Sox weekend series. I dragged myself to do some cardio today even though I'm sore and exhausted. Luckily, the Yanks/Sox had an afternoon game so I caught the end of it which kept me entertained on the treadmill.  Unfortunately, the Yankees pitching couldn't hold it down today nor could the offense back them up so I was feeling more anxiety while walking at my 10 degree incline than normal. Going to try to pick it up a notch despite my aches & pains because in 2 short months summer will be here & I've gotta be prepared!

Until next time...


Sunday, March 27, 2011

Getting to the Dance...

It is officially one of my favorite times of year... March Madness! This year's tournament has been full of big upsets & nail bitting games. VCU is the 2011 Cinderella team & they just advanced to the Elite 8 for the first time in their school's history which is pretty exciting. BYU was also fun to watch especially Jimmer Fredette & it was kind sad when they got eliminated Thursday night. Luckily, 2 of my Final 4 teams are still going strong... UNC & Kansas. UNC is my team so I'm always happy to see them do well. Today it gets down to the Final 4 so I'm crossing my fingers!

This week was weigh in week so naturally I was a nervous wreck all day Tuesday. I don't know why I get so crazed about weigh in, but that number on the scale messes with my head so bad, but our culture is obsessed with numbers & females are just conditioned to think in the case of weight less is always better hence my panic. Here are the results with last month's in parenthesis...

Weight: 152 (153)
Hips: 39 (40)
Waist: 30 (31.5)
R Thigh: 21 (21)
R arm: 10 3/4 (10 3/4)
Shoulders: 39 (39)
Body Fat: 27.4% (27.6%)

That's 2.5 inches & another pound this month for a grand total of 9.5 inches & almost 16 pounds since October! I was definitely feeling pretty good after that, but I can't lie, I would have liked a little more loss on the weight. Joe reminded me that now is when it's going to start to get hard because I don't have that much more to lose, but for my own personal comfort, I would prefer to be no more than 148. Maybe that's a bit of a reach, but I'm gonna give it a go. Just to show how much has changed since the end of the summer check this out...
End of summer 2010
March 2011 w/Stella
I guess I don't really notice the difference because I'm looking at myself, but just looking at these 2 pictures was a huge lift for me. People have started referring to me as "skinny" which I have to say almost makes me feel uncomfortable. That adjective isn't one I'd ever use to describe me. Someone else said that I've gotten "tiny" & I was like, "No way." There is nothing "tiny" about me. I'm a 5'7" girl that wears a size 10 shoe so tiny just isn't me. I think it can be hard to feel comfortable in your own body, but I'm trying to get there... 

So Joe thought it would be a good idea to focus on core this week & I should've known that was going to be a problem. However, what I ended up getting was a plyometrics work out! AWFUL! I had to jump onto a platform and squat down & do that for a minute, girl push ups with my hand on a sand bag ball & as I go down had to push the ball to the other hand for a minute, one handed swings with a medicine ball for 30 seconds each, jumps side to side & touching my foot to the sandbag ball for a minute & last but not least the inch worm (Not to be confused with the dance move). You start standing straight up & then walk your hands all the way out so that you're in a push up position & then walk your feet to your hands & repeat. HORRIBLE. 

I've had some rough lifting work outs a.k.a. "the man work out", but this work out actually made me want to cry because I was so upset that he would make me do that. I am not training for a sport so as far as I'm concerned my speed & agility are not high on my list. Sure that kind of work out burns a lot of calories but I was really annoyed that I had to do that. My goal is to sculpt my body & be fit, not be able to jump side to side really fast to impress the soccer scouts. Hopefully next week, he will get back to lifting. 

Food has been good lately. I'm trying to inject some more protein into my diet, which is kinda challenging with Lent. I would like to say that I have cooked fish 2 out of the 3 Fridays... that's right I cooked it. I hate it, but I cooked it. We had swordfish this week, which I have to say is the fish I tolerate the best. Lunch on Fridays is tough because I don't want to just eat carbs, so this week I settled on a salad and some Greek yogurt. I know there are only 3 more Fridays to go, but it's not easy when you aren't a fish fan. 

Well, I've got a busy couple of weeks ahead. I've gotta try to make it through school in one piece & then I will have 3 glorious months of not having to report to Seton Hall woo hoo!! And next week baseball season officially gets under way, which is the best part of spring! Did my fantasy baseball draft last night & I need a serious bounce back year so cross your fingers I get off to a good start! 
Until next time... 


Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Take You Back...

Happy Hump Day to all! This week is spring break for many college/graduate students. How am I spending my spring break you ask? Oh why I am staying in New Jersey waiting on the massive rain storms that are supposed to hit & flood the area over the next 3 days & working. I LOVE not having to drive to school, but since I can't be on a tropical island drinking really high calorie fruity drinks while getting a tan I'm just going to pretend that I'm on a beach somewhere really amazing. 

I spent most of the weekend cleaning out my computer room so that the rug could get ripped out & while doing that I stumbled upon lots of stuff that has been collecting dust on shelves and in drawers. Some of what I found was old pictures & all I could think of was, "Why did I think it was okay to go around looking like that?" In the last edition I mentioned about being a chubby kid... well here it is...
Yeah that's 4 year old Marisa...
Sometimes it's really hard to look back on how I used to be because I'd like to just kick myself for letting things get so out of control. I can't help but think maybe it wouldn't be such a challenge right now if I had started taking better care of myself younger? Grammar school & middle school were pretty bad, but those pictures are deep in the archives so this is the next best thing. Ready for another one... 
And it just kept going... me at 21
But I think all we can do as people is try to learn from our mistakes and not repeat them. Maybe the constant battle is a reminder of why I don't want to repeat any of those mistakes? I have to have some kind of reason to justify all of this pain, right? Ha! 

Okay so onto the work out routine... I think Joe gets such a kick out of the "man work out" that he enjoys making modified "man work outs" now. My first exercise was climbing up onto this squat machine with shoulder rests and weights on the sides and I was up on a platform. I should've known that was a bad sign... that lead to hammer curls/shoulder presses, chest press laying down on a bench w/my feet elevated, the DREADED unassisted bench dips, assisted reverse grip pull-ups, lunges with a 10 pound weight that I had to rotate every time I took a step, finished with  supermans/bananas. If you don't know about supermans/bananas they are incredibly challenging core exercises that I'm sure some man came up with just to torture women with. When it was time to start another set, Joe kept referring to it as "going back into the gauntlet" & I couldn't help but laugh because the gauntlet is EXACTLY what it felt like! I was totally spent when I left there, but at the same time I felt really accomplished. Sure, I feel beat up all the time, but I'm proud that I can make it through these difficult work outs. 

I'm in such a different place now than I was even five years ago... I want to challenge myself & I'll deal with pain because I know it's necessary. So I'll sit with an ice pack on my shoulder like a pitcher that just threw 8 awesome innings & keep going. I'm also really focused with my food right now & that helps a lot. However, now that Lent has set in, I'm up for even more of a challenge because fish & I aren't friends & I obviously can't eat pizza/pasta THAT much. I think I'm going to have to (gasp) cook the occasional swordfish over the next 6 weeks or so. I can tolerate that, but man do I hate cooking fish! I'm gonna try not to think about it for the time being... 

Well, my bed is screaming my name right now so I'm gonna try to fall asleep before midnight. These weeks just keep flying by & they're all starting to blur together. One more picture before I go... 
26...healthier & wiser :) 
Until next time... 

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

How Winning Is Done...

It's hard to believe I'm actually 26! It was an a good weekend of celebrating & I just want to thank everyone that came out to celebrate & to those who couldn't be there you were missed! Also, all the Facebook messages, texts & calls also really made my day which may sound lame, but it really did.

Ok so birthday celebrations aside, everything has been really busy, but before anything else, I must report on the weigh in and measurements from last week as I promised... The previous month's results are in parenthesis.

Weight: 152.5 (154)
Hips: 40 (40 3/4)
R Thigh: 21 1/2 (21)
R arm: 10 3/4 (11)
Waist: 31.5 (31.5)
Body Fat: 27.6% (27.6%)

That's 2 more inches down & almost 2 more pounds for a grand total of about 7 inches & 14 pounds since October! Joe was happy with my results & I have to say it's nice to see that all the hard work is paying off. I would've liked a little change in the waist & body fat, but Joe told me not to get hung up on that. Good results are good results. Still, that doesn't mean the work outs slow down. My biggest challenge that night was doing a girl push up & with one hand on the ground & one hand on a ball filled with sand and as I pushed up i had to shoot the ball over to my other hand before going down again. UGH. While the weight lifting and core exercises cause the most pain, for me, cardio is the biggest torture.

It really is a struggle to get myself to stay on the treadmill for at least 15 minutes especially on the days that I don't lift, because I just find it unfulfilling. Although, the other day I had the pleasure of watching Jake Gyllenhaal in "The Prince of Persia" while I walked at an incline so that was a very nice distraction that made the time go fast, but on the whole it's awful.

Last night, we did a modified "man work out" which was just about as challenging as the man work out... bench press on an incline, single leg presses, arm flections kneeling on one leg on a cable machine,  dead lifts with a curl, tricep extension with a barbell over my head while laying on a bench with my feet raised & the final one... squatting all the way down to the ground so my butt was on a bosu ball while holding a medicine ball, extending over the back, coming up all the way and throwing the ball back to Joe. I really wanted to know if he had something against me. Almost every muscle hurts today... but no pain no gain, right?

During my cardio last night, I noticed a girl about 4 treadmills down from me... she must've been about 10 and I saw her walk in with a woman I'm presuming was her mom. The girl reminded me of a younger version of myself. She was a little chunky and I'm guessing she was trying to get a head start on a weight problem no doubt other people had pointed out to her. I can remember being that age, being told I was chunky and wanting so much to not be. I tried different things... I would go for walks around my neighborhood, or ride my bike, & then for one Christmas I asked for the Fast Track (it was a machine that you powered yourself by sliding your legs back and forth on somewhat of a slope... but like many kids, after awhile I got bored or distracted and my weight loss path got lost. The real problem was my head wasn't in the right place. How could it be? I was a kid & I didn't think about how much harder it would be to lose weight as I got older. I guess a part of me felt like it would just go away on it's own. Part of me would love to go back in time & tell that little girl not to worry and that it would all work out when I was ready. Since it's impossible to go back, all I can do is keep moving forward.

Well, it's about time I call it a night... the Yankees have started playing spring training games & that means that spring really is creeping up so there's no time to slow down! Back to the gym Friday & Saturday. Hopefully next post I'll have some updated pictures to share. Until next time...


Thursday, February 17, 2011

Something For the Pain...

I am happy to say that it is officially one of my favorite times of year... the start of spring training! By next week all players will have reported to camp and baseball will be underway! It has always been one of my biggest dreams to go down to Tampa & go to the Yankees' spring training facility and see all of my favorites (especially #2) up close & personal, but unfortunately I haven't made it there yet. I am determined to go in the next 4 years (before Derek Jeter's contract is up!)

Currently, I am sitting on my bed watching "Grey's Anatomy" with an ice pack on my left shoulder & a lidoderm patch on my lower back & that is because Joe decided to put me through a man work out on Tuesday. Now, I'd like to consider myself a fairly tough chick when it comes to my work outs. I enjoy lifting more than just standing on a cardio machine, but this pain is just unnecessary. The work out started with full dead lifts with a 40 pound barbell & since my form was so great Joe decided to bump it up to 70 pounds (3 sets), then I got to do a bench press with the 35 pound barbell & thankfully he didn't throw any extra weight on that (3 sets), squats with the same bar behind my neck so it was resting on my shoulders (3 sets), half dead lifts with a bicep curl (3 sets), lateral extensions (3 sets) & to finish it all off... UNASSISTED DIPS (3 sets). I can't wrap my head around WHY a girl would ever need to do unassisted dips? Assisted dips sure, but having to hold my whole body weight up on the edge of a bench and drop down and come back up after everything else is just awful. And 3 sets of everything! I literally feel like I've been hit by a truck. I don't know if ALL of those exercises were necessary in the same work out. Muscle soreness is fine, but I'm going on day 3 tomorrow & I doubt I won't still be sore.

I try to remind myself that it'll all be worth it, but when my body is screaming I can't necessarily think about the big picture. Tuesday is weigh in and measurement day so naturally I'm nervous for that. I've been trying to get more protein in my diet so I've been alternating oatmeal and eggs in the morning and salad and half a sandwich at lunch. I'm just so bored with my food! I think this weekend I'm gonna check out some recipes and see what I can find. I need a little something different or I'm going to go crazy. Until Tuesday I'll be drinking as much green tea as possible & loading up on asparagus to help flush all the toxins out of my body. Tomorrow is cardio day & Saturday I'll get in another round of lifting. I like how I've been looking even though I'm not completely happy yet and that's why I'll keep on pushing myself. When you're a former fat girl, there's just no other way.

I will definitely report back with the weigh in & measurements after Tuesday. Everyone keep their fingers crossed for me & hope for good results! Until next time...


Friday, February 11, 2011

Summer's Just Around the Bend...

Another long week is almost in the books! I hope everyone is surviving the cold, snow & ice that winter has been giving us an abundance of. This weather just makes me want to stay under the covers, watch movies and eat... but obviously that can't happen. All I can do is throw on a bunch of layers of clothes and head out to the gym and get my body ready for summer!

Unfortunately, the change in my school schedule makes getting to the gym a little bit harder, but I'm still doing it. Sure I feel like falling on my face, but no pain no gain, right? Tuesday is my day to train with Joe & then I'm left with Friday and Saturday to go on my own. The other day while I was on the treadmill there was this girl with a PERFECT body running of course and all I could think was that some people are just blessed to be born with amazing bodies. I am not one of those people, but they do exist! Those are the people that LOVE doing cardio and eating really healthy food and I would like to just force feed them cheeseburgers!

The food can be even harder than the working out in my opinion. We tend to fall into patterns with food and eat basically the same thing ALL the time. Almost every morning I eat oatmeal... not because I enjoy it, but because I know it's good for me. Occasionally I'll switch it up with eggs or some Special K but for the most part, oatmeal is my breakfast date. Lunch is usually some form of chicken either over salad or with veggies...although occasionally I'll have a half of a sandwich or something left over from dinner the night before... dinner can vary but I end up cooking a lot of chicken. Chicken, chicken, chicken! Sometimes I just want to throw the chicken across the room, but I know I've got goals so I've gotta eat the it.

I'm still feeling the pain from Tuesday's work out, but more than just regular muscle aches, the pain in my shoulder has not been fun times. Joe decided it would be a good idea to do an upper body work out. Ugh. If my left shoulder didn't get tired so quickly it wouldn't be so bad, but since it does it makes 15 reps feel like 40. Reverse pull ups should be outlawed. Chicks don't exactly have a ton of upper body strength as it is and when you have to hold up your entire body weight and pull your chest up to a bar you are reminded why girls suck at doing those kinds of things. Today I did some cardio and tomorrow I'll do full body work out.

I started thinking about how tight my muscles are and how yoga would probably benefit me A LOT. 2 years ago I started doing yoga (purchased one of those cheesy DVDs) and it helped me get out some of those unwanted knots and actually relax a little bit, but I haven't done it in such a long time because trying to do yoga at home never works out well because I always get interrupted. I wish they had it at my gym, but maybe one of these days I'll get back into it. If you're thinking it's just a bunch of deep breaths and weird positions with weird names while that's kind of true, it's actually really good for the body.

Well, it's time for me to call it a night. I hope everyone has a great weekend & a Happy Valentine's Day. For those of us in the Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band... here's to better luck next year! But until then, I'll just imagine that I'm snuggling up with this...
Joshua Jackson... my first celebrity crush & even better looking now!
Until next time... 


Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Getting It Done...

It's been a little while since I've posted so I figured now was a good time. Work has been absolutely insane & as my responsibilities grow every day, I know it's only going to get more and more crazy. I also started school again last week so adding classes to my craziness is sure to be a fun time.

So last week was supposed to be weigh in and then we got hit with a nasty snow/ice storm so Joe had to cancel, which I was completely bummed about because I was SO ready for it. I decided that I would just weigh myself when I went to the gym and then Joe could just do my measurements the following week. Well, I sent myself into a panic because it appeared that the number stayed the same from the previous month. Naturally, I flipped out. I couldn't believe there was NO change... my clothes are big on me and I can feel the difference so how is it possible my weight didn't go down?

Yes, I realize that muscle weighs more than fat, but I couldn't help but be obsessed with the number. What is it about the number that gets us all into a tizzy? Society seems to be a fan of people who are smaller sizes etc and that gets into all of our heads. Especially if you're someone who has battled their weight... the numbers basically rule your life. It's borderline crazy, but if you've been there you know exactly what I'm talking about.

I spent the rest of the week really watching everything & I went to the gym almost every day. So today was the day of truth... Here are the results:

Weight: 154.5
Body fat: 27.6% (28)
Hips: 41 1/4 (41 1/2)
Thigh: 21 1/2 (21 3/4)
Waist: 31 1/2 (32 1/2)
Shoulders: 39 1/2 (40)
Bicep: 11 (11)

WAHOO!! In 3 months time I'm down 13 pounds, lost a total of almost 7 inches, and dropped my body fat 8%! Apparently all that chicken and veggies are paying off! Not to mention all those awful cardio sessions! Joe talked to me about my food to see if I've really changed anything in the past month, and I really haven't. He is concerned that I am not eating enough calories in a day. He is probably right... actually I know that he is right, I don't eat enough in a day.

I'm not fool enough to think that you can consume a whole bunch of extra calories and expect to just lose weight, but I do know that when you're weight training you have to feed your muscles and I'm definitely not doing that as often as I should. So I have to keep a food journal for 2-3 days and then Joe will come up with some ways to interject a couple hundred extra calories in a healthy way. I have to get past the number obsession and realize that as long as my measurements and my body fat continue to drop, then if my overall weight isn't quite as low as I would prefer, I'm still getting the job done.

I have been ordered not to work out until next Tuesday as part of the rest my body so I don't hit a plateau  and so I don't feel like I've been hit by a truck on a daily basis. I do feel kind of guilty about not working out for a week, but Joe insisted it has to be done.  Maybe it really will do me some good.

I'm feeling really focused, which is a good thing & I've got my goal in sight. Jessica Biel body here I come!
Until next time... 

Friday, January 14, 2011

Falling Apart?

I hope everyone in the tri-state area made it through the second snow storm of the season all right. I HATE snow & will be happy when spring rolls in. Sure the snow looks pretty while it's falling, but after that it's just one big mess. Especially when there's too much snow and no where to put it. Trying to park is absolute hell because the snow covers up too much of the space so perfectly good parking spaces can't be utilized. AWFUL.

Okay, enough of my snow bitching. The start of the week was definitely sad because Chris & John headed back to the caribbean & don't come back until April. It's just not the same when all 4 of us aren't together, but I'm hoping the time will go by fast.

I would like to say that after almost 4 months of serious working out my body feels great, but it feels anything but that. I literally feel like I've been hit by a truck and everything hurts, my left shoulder in particular. It's so incredibly frustrating because I can't lift the way that I want because my shoulder gets tired so quickly and then starts to hurt. My right side feels perfectly fine, but then there's my left shoulder not holding up its end of the deal. The pain is pretty intense at times & I've tried everything from ice packs to heat packs to anti inflammatories and nothing is doing the trick. Joe said that since I haven't really taken a break since we started training back in October, it's time I take a week off.

A WHOLE WEEK?! I couldn't believe my ears, but apparently it's good to rest your body completely every 12 weeks give or take. The body gets used to doing certain things & then hits a plateau & plateaus are the WORST. You feel like you are working hard, but the numbers aren't changing. Joe explained that by allowing the body to rest and recover when it's time to start up again, it's almost like a shock and the body will respond better. I'm all for a positive response & there's no doubt that these muscles could use a break, but considering I am after all a former fat girl, it makes me a little nervous to shut down even for only a week.

Then I thought about it... one week isn't really THAT long in the grand scheme of things & considering I've been doing well with my portions and what I've been eating I should be able to keep things under control while resting my body. The plan is to do weigh in and measurements on Tuesday & then rest up until the following Tuesday. I've been trying to get a little more cardio in the past couple of weeks due to the holidays & I wish I could say at this point I was starting to tolerate it a little better than before, but alas I loathe cardio. There was a girl on a treadmill next to me the other day running at full speed like it was absolutely no big deal. Meanwhile, I'm sucking wind after a 30 second sprint. She looked like she could go all day on that treadmill & I just couldn't wait until my time was up.

Today I enjoyed a long overdue day off that wasn't a national holiday or a state of emergency! I treated myself to an upper body massage to try & get my shoulder fixed. Turns out my left scapula (basically the whole shoulder blade) is not only inflamed but full of knots that aren't easy to get rid of. LOVELY. The massage therapist advised that I have it worked on again soon. Considering how long it took me to get this day off I can only hope it doesn't take as long for another one.  

Tomorrow I'll be hitting the gym again & then Tuesday is the big weigh in. I will make sure to report back with the results. I'm hoping they'll be really good & just maybe I can snag myself this guy...
The one & only Tim Tebow <3 I'll keep working hard. 

Until next time... 


Wednesday, January 5, 2011


Happy 2011 everyone! I hope that everyone enjoyed the holidays. I definitely did which is why there has been such a delay in posts. Santa was very good to me... I got my very own punching bag & a kick ass set of boxing gloves that I can't wait to use! Danny has already headed back to his base in California & in less than 5 days Chris & John go back to the caribbean so I'm trying to make the most of the time.

Despite the extra opportunities for eating non healthy food & drinking, I have to say I've been pretty solid on my program. I even went to the gym on Christmas Eve to get a last minute cardio session in before two straight days of eating. Portion control has been something that I keep in the front of my mind at all times. Since there was so much food, I decided to break things in half or eat a small amount at a time. My aunt makes this killer pepperoni bread & on NYE I had to remind myself eating half of it was enough. It's really difficult when something tastes SO good to just have a little bit isn't easy. Still, I have to remind myself the ultimate goal & stick to small portions.

My work outs have been going well even though Joe's obsession with the number 15 is starting to get to me. It's always a good sign when you're dripping sweat, right? Unfortunately, my shoulder has been bothering me for several weeks now & I've kept that from Joe because I didn't want to seem like I was being a wuss. I hate looking weak & saying I can't do something because of a nagging pain. I know structurally there is nothing wrong my with shoulder... my bones are all where they're supposed to be & nothing is torn, but despite that, it still hurts. It very well could be a very big knot or a pinched nerve or both, but either way it's hanging around a lot longer than I would've liked. I've been spending a lot of time with the heating pad & Icy/Hot patches are my new best friend.

Yesterday, I finally broke down & told Joe that my shoulder has been giving me trouble so rather than do the regularly scheduled focus on upper body work out, we did a full body work out & tried not to aggravate my shoulder too much. It seems right now just about everything aggravates it, but I'm determined to push through & keep going. Joe advised that I try to go for a massage to maybe work out whatever has tightened up within my shoulder blade. There is nothing more I would like right now than a day at a spa, but I really haven't had the time to do that. I'm thinking of taking a day off next week before the semester starts up again & a massage just might have to go on the agenda.

Tomorrow I'll hit the gym & probably again on Saturday. The weekend will be full of birthday & farewell celebrations aka lots of food & alcohol, but I'm determined to remain controlled. Weigh in is less than 2 weeks away & I won't get off my path. Jessica Biel body here I come!

Until next time!